Friday, 29 July 2016

Tara's 9th birthday

I can see the birthday countdown board on Tara's door. With days to go, she's excited, expectations are high, the pressure is on.

I've been ill for three weeks. Today is the first day I got out of bed without a crunching "face-ache". I feel almost human again. Its not been easy. Tara and I got struck down as we were preparing to go on our summer holiday - all three of us. Cancelling our holiday was an expensive, stressful and difficult decision to make, but it had to be done. Tara started getting better within days of the cancellation, while I went downhill faster than a smooth greased pebble skiing on butter..

I don't recall being so ill in years. There was nothing to do but suffer through it. It didn't help that The Husband was on holiday. I felt guilty as hell for ruining his time off, and he didn't do much in terms of reassuring me. Instead he decided to grow his facial hair and sulk. It also didn't help that it was the school holiday. I had Tara at home along with the Husband. What a nightmare! Far from anyone 'taking care" of me (yeah right!), I felt under constant pressure to get well soon.

Anyway, Im well enough to vent my feelings here, and have to put together a plan for Tara's birthday. The Husband appeared shaved and slightly less grumpy today. Not sure if he was expecting applause and praise for looking civilised again. He knows I have a severe phobia of facial hair on him - not the world in general-just him. He still chose to sport it while I was at my lowest.

Maybe its the after effects of antibiotics, or just a return of some PTSD but I can't seem to face anyone today-least of all him. Tara meanwhile is immensely relieved to "see" her father again. She's been complaining about his unkempt overgrowth for days. Me? Im just happy to feel not terribly unwell again.